Who does Santa take when he goes to Mexico??? PABLO, of course! For all those who rolled their eyes over the past 35 years, please check out this fabulous rendition of Pablo the Reindeer from Mexico on YouTube. I AM VINDICATED!!! And I love the song!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-riQuj1UB3A&feature=related
Thursday, December 18, 2008
Snow Thunder?
I woke up this morning around 5:30, my husband was leaving for work. So I lied on the couch to make sure he got up the hill okay (he was curious to know what I was going to do if he didn't make it) (the answer is nothing, but hey, I was a cheerleader, what do you want me to do besides cheer you on?).
But I digress. It was snowing on TV, somewhere in Seattle or the surrounding area. The snow, all 2 or 3 inches of it, is nonstop news matter today. I saw not one, not two, but 3 different reporters in different areas, at least 20 miles apart from each other, pushing aside a thin layer of snow to reveal a thin layer of ice. Just in case we didn't get it from the first reporter. I was slightly bored and falling asleep at this point.
Then, of all things, they annouce we have SNOW THUNDER. WHAT? Am I dreaming this, or am I awake? Yep, in Snoqualmie, or Snohomish, or Sno-wherever the reporter was, it was snowing, and there was thunder. He explained that a thunderstorm in the snow was called Snow Thunder. I'm not buying it. First of all, I thought you needed heat to have thunder. I am sure it was just trucks crashing into each other on the road out of his sight and he was mistaking it for thunder. Or else some cute little boys were smashing a big thin sheet of metal that fell off of a truck (trucks around here drop stuff ALL the time), and that's what the reporter was hearing. I bet he'd fall for the War of the Worlds trick on the radio if we gave it a try.
Snow Thunder. What will they think of next? Snow Tsunami? That's a good one. Let's try it.
But I digress. It was snowing on TV, somewhere in Seattle or the surrounding area. The snow, all 2 or 3 inches of it, is nonstop news matter today. I saw not one, not two, but 3 different reporters in different areas, at least 20 miles apart from each other, pushing aside a thin layer of snow to reveal a thin layer of ice. Just in case we didn't get it from the first reporter. I was slightly bored and falling asleep at this point.
Then, of all things, they annouce we have SNOW THUNDER. WHAT? Am I dreaming this, or am I awake? Yep, in Snoqualmie, or Snohomish, or Sno-wherever the reporter was, it was snowing, and there was thunder. He explained that a thunderstorm in the snow was called Snow Thunder. I'm not buying it. First of all, I thought you needed heat to have thunder. I am sure it was just trucks crashing into each other on the road out of his sight and he was mistaking it for thunder. Or else some cute little boys were smashing a big thin sheet of metal that fell off of a truck (trucks around here drop stuff ALL the time), and that's what the reporter was hearing. I bet he'd fall for the War of the Worlds trick on the radio if we gave it a try.
Snow Thunder. What will they think of next? Snow Tsunami? That's a good one. Let's try it.
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
Death by Mexican
I love Mexican food. I mean, LOVE it. I could probably eat it every day, for every meal. I spent a week in Mexico and that's all I ate. It was glorious. The only problem is that Mexican does not like me. Every single time I eat it, without fail, I get the most severe indigestion and heartburn. Even though I take prozac every day and NEVER get heartburn. Mexican eliminates the entire drug in my system.
So, a sensible person would probably not eat Mexican, at least, not very frequently. But me? NAH. I eat it all the time. Tonight I took my daughter to a place that gives me the worst indigestion I have ever had, and what did I do? Ate Mexican. I have been severely uncomfortable and even in pain for more than 3 hours now. My stomach acid mocks antacids like Tums. That didn't even work when I was in 5th grade. An entire bottle wouldn't work on it right now. So I don't bother, I am drinking a Mexican beer to make it even worse. Might as well go for the gold.
I have, as you might have guessed, GERD. That is Gastro Esophagal Reflux blah blah blah. It means my stomach acid shoots up my esophagus because my flap SUCKS. That is in human speak. MFS. My Flap Sucks. And so did my digestive life until the creation of the God almighty Prilosec. It made me normal, well, at least my flap normal, and I was gleeful. Of course, my Diverticulosis condition is not really controlled by Prilosec. It certainly seems to be better off with it (for those of you who don't know, diverticulosis is essentially that the inside of my intestines is not flat and smooth, but more of a roller coaster ride, the Fun Person gene is in my intestines). Sometimes things go down the hill and don't come back up the hill. STUCK. And no service emergency team to remove the poor coaster riders. So, it ferments and causes severe pain and eventually you puke your brains out for 2 days. It's so pretty, usually only old people get it, but it runs in my family and I got lucky.
My husband complains that I did not tell him about the defects until after we were married. Like I was gonna tell him THAT. He can live with it, he really doesn't have a choice anymore!
So, back to the Mexican topic. I get so easily distracted. I eat Mexican all the time, I go with my friends, I never complain, and I suffer for hours afterwards. I go with my husband too. I go alone. I take my child. You would think eventually my body would simply refuse to open my mouth and bend my arm to prevent the poison from entering me, but no. I continue to torture myself and I will probably end up dead with a burrito in my hand one day. What a way to go. I hope I get run over by a taco truck while I am eating my burrito. That would be hilarious. None of you could keep a straight face at the funeral. Especially Cindy from college. She got run over by a hot dog cart in NYC (where we went to college) and I laughed my ass off for so long her roommate almost kicked my butt in. She'd probably put a rotten hot dog in my coffin. I would like that. She always did have a sense of humor.
I think I have some burritos in the freezer too....hmmmmmm...ttyl!!!
So, a sensible person would probably not eat Mexican, at least, not very frequently. But me? NAH. I eat it all the time. Tonight I took my daughter to a place that gives me the worst indigestion I have ever had, and what did I do? Ate Mexican. I have been severely uncomfortable and even in pain for more than 3 hours now. My stomach acid mocks antacids like Tums. That didn't even work when I was in 5th grade. An entire bottle wouldn't work on it right now. So I don't bother, I am drinking a Mexican beer to make it even worse. Might as well go for the gold.
I have, as you might have guessed, GERD. That is Gastro Esophagal Reflux blah blah blah. It means my stomach acid shoots up my esophagus because my flap SUCKS. That is in human speak. MFS. My Flap Sucks. And so did my digestive life until the creation of the God almighty Prilosec. It made me normal, well, at least my flap normal, and I was gleeful. Of course, my Diverticulosis condition is not really controlled by Prilosec. It certainly seems to be better off with it (for those of you who don't know, diverticulosis is essentially that the inside of my intestines is not flat and smooth, but more of a roller coaster ride, the Fun Person gene is in my intestines). Sometimes things go down the hill and don't come back up the hill. STUCK. And no service emergency team to remove the poor coaster riders. So, it ferments and causes severe pain and eventually you puke your brains out for 2 days. It's so pretty, usually only old people get it, but it runs in my family and I got lucky.
My husband complains that I did not tell him about the defects until after we were married. Like I was gonna tell him THAT. He can live with it, he really doesn't have a choice anymore!
So, back to the Mexican topic. I get so easily distracted. I eat Mexican all the time, I go with my friends, I never complain, and I suffer for hours afterwards. I go with my husband too. I go alone. I take my child. You would think eventually my body would simply refuse to open my mouth and bend my arm to prevent the poison from entering me, but no. I continue to torture myself and I will probably end up dead with a burrito in my hand one day. What a way to go. I hope I get run over by a taco truck while I am eating my burrito. That would be hilarious. None of you could keep a straight face at the funeral. Especially Cindy from college. She got run over by a hot dog cart in NYC (where we went to college) and I laughed my ass off for so long her roommate almost kicked my butt in. She'd probably put a rotten hot dog in my coffin. I would like that. She always did have a sense of humor.
I think I have some burritos in the freezer too....hmmmmmm...ttyl!!!
Sunday, November 30, 2008
Aliens Attack
The first time I saw this photo, I could not figure out what the heck it was. I thought my son was running for his life and my daughter was ready to greet the aliens as they grabbed her with their long, spindly creepy arms. After I looked at it for a while, I realized it is a fountain in Seattle. I wonder if it is the same one that naked men ran into and tried to play with children. There is something seriously wrong with Seattlites. It's not illegal. Go figure.
Saturday, November 29, 2008
A child of grace
Forget about Thanksgiving. There is a person in this world that gives me hope and gratitude simply by being herself. And she is only 13 years old.
Let's start at the source. My daughter, known by many of you, is a bit different. She looks different because she has wild, crazy curly hair and she not only loves it, she flaunts it. She is extremely artistic and polite, and adults have always just loved her. Girls are not quite the same. My daughter is not socially skilled, she will never be the queen bee because she is not skilled at reading others and making a strategy to deal with others. She truly believes that we all should support each other and be nice and happy. She is the ulitimate flower girl, that's how my mind gives her an image. A girl in a field of daisies, reaching her arms out to the world. It makes me love her even more.
But we all know that this is not "normal" to most girls. And for several years, I have noticed girls who don't "get" Chloe. That's what Makaela says, her friend and fellow Girl Scout. I believe she is right, but also very kind to the girls who don't get her. But, since we have moved here, there has been one girl who has unfailingly been kind and thoughtful to my daughter despite the fact that she is very much the socialite. I know, I was one too.
Nicole is the daughter of my good friend Chris. Several years ago, about a year after I moved here, I told Chris about my worries that not a lot of girls I invited to Chloe's tea birthday party would come. Chris told me to invite Nicole, who is 2 years older, and so I did. I figured Nicole would come because Chris would make her, but she actually was happy to come and was so wonderful to all of the girls. Nicole came to Chloe's slumber party the following year. This year, Chloe handed an invitation to Nicole and she was so kind to explain why she couldn't come. Chloe thinks Nicole is the kindest person in the world.
To be honest, I was always a bit worried (not me!) thinking Chris made Nicole do these things. I have no idea why, because Nicole was always happy and nice and seemed to enjoy helping out. She's extremely capable. But she's more than that. She is kind. That is not average for a girl who is attractive and smart and outgoing.
A week or so ago, I told Chris how Chloe went to her first gymnastics practice and came home crying hysterically, and after we hung up, about 3 minutes later Nicole called me and asked if Chloe would be interested in working with her to learn a routine or two. I said yes, and completely forgot about it. Chris called the day we were available and picked up Chloe and Nicole, whatever she did, worked wonders with Chloe. Chloe is now so happy and enjoys gymnastics and is not upset that she is not perfect at it.
I think it helps when an older girl (an 8th grader!!!!) tells you that you are okay and nice. I think Nicole is really exceptional, even in our Girl Scout world. She is constantly, despite being the most normal kid I know, showing how exceptional she is. She gives me hope for the future, for kids who grow up without our experiences and responsibilities. She is amazing, beautiful, cool, smart-ass, and friendly. She is at least 15 years ahead of me when I was her age in the finest ways. I look forward to seeing her in 10 years, 20 years, to know what difference she is making in life. A girl like Nicole, being a stay at home mom or an executive or an international peacemaker, will make a huge difference in the lives of the people she touches. I know, she has touched my heart so many times. I am so thankful that her mom and dad met and fell in love, and are raising such an amazing kid.
Funny thing is, she would be embarassed if she knew how I felt. She thinks of herself as average, I am willing to bet. But she doesn't really know the effect she has on my life, and my daughter's life. And that is the exceptional part of Nicole that gives me such pleasure. She is so amazing, and she really will make a difference in this world. She already has.
Let's start at the source. My daughter, known by many of you, is a bit different. She looks different because she has wild, crazy curly hair and she not only loves it, she flaunts it. She is extremely artistic and polite, and adults have always just loved her. Girls are not quite the same. My daughter is not socially skilled, she will never be the queen bee because she is not skilled at reading others and making a strategy to deal with others. She truly believes that we all should support each other and be nice and happy. She is the ulitimate flower girl, that's how my mind gives her an image. A girl in a field of daisies, reaching her arms out to the world. It makes me love her even more.
But we all know that this is not "normal" to most girls. And for several years, I have noticed girls who don't "get" Chloe. That's what Makaela says, her friend and fellow Girl Scout. I believe she is right, but also very kind to the girls who don't get her. But, since we have moved here, there has been one girl who has unfailingly been kind and thoughtful to my daughter despite the fact that she is very much the socialite. I know, I was one too.
Nicole is the daughter of my good friend Chris. Several years ago, about a year after I moved here, I told Chris about my worries that not a lot of girls I invited to Chloe's tea birthday party would come. Chris told me to invite Nicole, who is 2 years older, and so I did. I figured Nicole would come because Chris would make her, but she actually was happy to come and was so wonderful to all of the girls. Nicole came to Chloe's slumber party the following year. This year, Chloe handed an invitation to Nicole and she was so kind to explain why she couldn't come. Chloe thinks Nicole is the kindest person in the world.
To be honest, I was always a bit worried (not me!) thinking Chris made Nicole do these things. I have no idea why, because Nicole was always happy and nice and seemed to enjoy helping out. She's extremely capable. But she's more than that. She is kind. That is not average for a girl who is attractive and smart and outgoing.
A week or so ago, I told Chris how Chloe went to her first gymnastics practice and came home crying hysterically, and after we hung up, about 3 minutes later Nicole called me and asked if Chloe would be interested in working with her to learn a routine or two. I said yes, and completely forgot about it. Chris called the day we were available and picked up Chloe and Nicole, whatever she did, worked wonders with Chloe. Chloe is now so happy and enjoys gymnastics and is not upset that she is not perfect at it.
I think it helps when an older girl (an 8th grader!!!!) tells you that you are okay and nice. I think Nicole is really exceptional, even in our Girl Scout world. She is constantly, despite being the most normal kid I know, showing how exceptional she is. She gives me hope for the future, for kids who grow up without our experiences and responsibilities. She is amazing, beautiful, cool, smart-ass, and friendly. She is at least 15 years ahead of me when I was her age in the finest ways. I look forward to seeing her in 10 years, 20 years, to know what difference she is making in life. A girl like Nicole, being a stay at home mom or an executive or an international peacemaker, will make a huge difference in the lives of the people she touches. I know, she has touched my heart so many times. I am so thankful that her mom and dad met and fell in love, and are raising such an amazing kid.
Funny thing is, she would be embarassed if she knew how I felt. She thinks of herself as average, I am willing to bet. But she doesn't really know the effect she has on my life, and my daughter's life. And that is the exceptional part of Nicole that gives me such pleasure. She is so amazing, and she really will make a difference in this world. She already has.
Thursday, November 27, 2008
Gearing up
Today is Thanksgiving. I took a bit of inspiration from one or two of my Girl Scout friends, and I make a week long schedule for having my husband's family over. It worked out really well, broke down all my chores into smaller pieces for me and I got it all done. The only trouble was the arguement my husband and I had over how to make the stuffing. We ended up compromising and the stuffing turned out the best I have ever had to be honest.
Anyway, I had a great day and I am very thankful today. My husband is the greatest guy, and I am madly in love with him, and my kids are growing and learning and are good people, my inlaws are amazing and my family, messed up as it can be at times, is moving in the right direction.
I am also thankful for my friends. Katie, who had a baby girl a few months ago and still manages to call me before I call her, and Lisa the Brit, who taught me that mini mince pies are much better than a huge one, Chris, who cares so much AND taught me the incredible life of KISS,(keep it simple stupid), and Amy, who always seems to have one more piece of herself to give, and Kelly, who is like an egg, she shows you the hard shell but she's a big softie inside, and Beth, who makes me laugh my ass off and is very honest and such a decent person, Debbie, who has a heart of gold and lets me drag her through the mud everywhere, Lynn, who is totally nuts but would do anything for a friend, Marty, who is truly wacky but is content to be that way, and Baltimore Sue, who never lived in Baltimore but that's what my husband calls her. Sue and I have had many years as friends, and usually we were on the same side of things, but recently we weren't. I seem to have lost my taste for her sense of humor, I find it harsh nowadays, either due to my age or my environment, but she and I can overlook that aspect of life and still care about each other's happiness. My friend Denise, who I rarely hear from but who is like a sister to me when I do get to see her. Brenda, who is unspeakably interesting and fun, and Anthony, who understands the best parts of life. Brenda and Anthony unwittingly gave me hope and direction in life when I was at the bottom of an emotional pit, and they brought me back with a confidence and strength that I never could have achieved on my own. I am so thankful for them.
I am thankful for so many more, but I have run out of time. Happy Happy, hope your turkey gravy was as good as mine!!
Anyway, I had a great day and I am very thankful today. My husband is the greatest guy, and I am madly in love with him, and my kids are growing and learning and are good people, my inlaws are amazing and my family, messed up as it can be at times, is moving in the right direction.
I am also thankful for my friends. Katie, who had a baby girl a few months ago and still manages to call me before I call her, and Lisa the Brit, who taught me that mini mince pies are much better than a huge one, Chris, who cares so much AND taught me the incredible life of KISS,(keep it simple stupid), and Amy, who always seems to have one more piece of herself to give, and Kelly, who is like an egg, she shows you the hard shell but she's a big softie inside, and Beth, who makes me laugh my ass off and is very honest and such a decent person, Debbie, who has a heart of gold and lets me drag her through the mud everywhere, Lynn, who is totally nuts but would do anything for a friend, Marty, who is truly wacky but is content to be that way, and Baltimore Sue, who never lived in Baltimore but that's what my husband calls her. Sue and I have had many years as friends, and usually we were on the same side of things, but recently we weren't. I seem to have lost my taste for her sense of humor, I find it harsh nowadays, either due to my age or my environment, but she and I can overlook that aspect of life and still care about each other's happiness. My friend Denise, who I rarely hear from but who is like a sister to me when I do get to see her. Brenda, who is unspeakably interesting and fun, and Anthony, who understands the best parts of life. Brenda and Anthony unwittingly gave me hope and direction in life when I was at the bottom of an emotional pit, and they brought me back with a confidence and strength that I never could have achieved on my own. I am so thankful for them.
I am thankful for so many more, but I have run out of time. Happy Happy, hope your turkey gravy was as good as mine!!
Saturday, November 15, 2008
time
ok, it is time I decide to write again. I know there are a few of you who will be happy to think that the McCain emails will stop, but they probably will never stop completely. I am thinking my Sarah Palin entries have just begun.
See, the thing is, I appreciate people who are very different from me. I like everyone from strippers to priests. Most crap simply does not bother me. I used to wonder why other people were so unable to genuinely get along with all the people I condsider my friends, and to be perfectly honest, after 43 years, I still don't get it.
I like Sarah Palin because she's a hard ass mom who took over her party and her state. I like the fact that she is much prettier and more fun than most female (ok, ALL female) politicians. I like the fact that she shoots a gun, though I never have. I think she is slightly insane for firing a personal chef and cooking for her family, but hey, what else is there to do in winter in Alaska. I may not agree with all of her views, but this country is based on balance. No extreme right or left politician is going to last for long. Did anyone notice Bill Clinton was practically a socialist until the country put down their congressional-voting foot? So, no, I am not afraid of Palin, I celebrate her, as a woman, and as a tough assed chick who can probably kick a lot of butt.
I have tired of people being so afraid of politicians who are not like them. I am tired of people being greedy and expecting the government to drag them through life. I worked my ass off, and now I volunteer my ass off, and people still never think they get enough. I give up. It's sad, but I really don't care to submerge myself in that environment anymore. I am going to take my money and my time and donate it to myself and my husband and my kids. I am going to work my ass into shape and give my husband something to drool after. I will make my kids laugh and have fun and stop pushing them to the side sometimes to help the rest of the world.
The only people I will still help are the special needs kids and families. A good friend recently said she was voting for Obama simply because of pro choice values. She felt that Sarah Palin was wrong to bring a Downs Syndrome child into the world. This is a woman who works with special needs teenagers. She feels most of them would be happier if they never lived. I disagree. My cousin is Downs, an old High School friend has a Downs son. You know what? They are happy, because the parents who are raising them are not ignoring them or trying to hide their disability. Why kill the child when the parents are the ones to blame? Suck it up people and start realizing that everyone can be happy, and everyone can be sad. It's not your choice to make for others. I love Sarah Palin for having Trig, I love his name even if it does send math-fear convulsions into my brain. I admire a woman who essentially gives the finger to the rest of this judgemental world. She has my vote, and my donation, if she ever runs again. No matter how scared of her you are. You all need to get spine. And an appreciation of the extremes of humanity.
See, the thing is, I appreciate people who are very different from me. I like everyone from strippers to priests. Most crap simply does not bother me. I used to wonder why other people were so unable to genuinely get along with all the people I condsider my friends, and to be perfectly honest, after 43 years, I still don't get it.
I like Sarah Palin because she's a hard ass mom who took over her party and her state. I like the fact that she is much prettier and more fun than most female (ok, ALL female) politicians. I like the fact that she shoots a gun, though I never have. I think she is slightly insane for firing a personal chef and cooking for her family, but hey, what else is there to do in winter in Alaska. I may not agree with all of her views, but this country is based on balance. No extreme right or left politician is going to last for long. Did anyone notice Bill Clinton was practically a socialist until the country put down their congressional-voting foot? So, no, I am not afraid of Palin, I celebrate her, as a woman, and as a tough assed chick who can probably kick a lot of butt.
I have tired of people being so afraid of politicians who are not like them. I am tired of people being greedy and expecting the government to drag them through life. I worked my ass off, and now I volunteer my ass off, and people still never think they get enough. I give up. It's sad, but I really don't care to submerge myself in that environment anymore. I am going to take my money and my time and donate it to myself and my husband and my kids. I am going to work my ass into shape and give my husband something to drool after. I will make my kids laugh and have fun and stop pushing them to the side sometimes to help the rest of the world.
The only people I will still help are the special needs kids and families. A good friend recently said she was voting for Obama simply because of pro choice values. She felt that Sarah Palin was wrong to bring a Downs Syndrome child into the world. This is a woman who works with special needs teenagers. She feels most of them would be happier if they never lived. I disagree. My cousin is Downs, an old High School friend has a Downs son. You know what? They are happy, because the parents who are raising them are not ignoring them or trying to hide their disability. Why kill the child when the parents are the ones to blame? Suck it up people and start realizing that everyone can be happy, and everyone can be sad. It's not your choice to make for others. I love Sarah Palin for having Trig, I love his name even if it does send math-fear convulsions into my brain. I admire a woman who essentially gives the finger to the rest of this judgemental world. She has my vote, and my donation, if she ever runs again. No matter how scared of her you are. You all need to get spine. And an appreciation of the extremes of humanity.
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