So many days, so many ways...TO DIE

Yes, I really do think about these things and worry constantly about them!

 

The Odds of Dying in ...
· Motor vehicle: 1-in-84
· Motorcyle: 1-in-938
· Bicycle: 1-in-4,472
· Air travel: 1-in-5,552
· Bus: 1-in-94,242
· Train: 1-in-139,617

 

The Odds You'll ...
· Be a Victim of ID Theft: 1-in-465
· Have an adverse reaction to a prescription drug: 1-in-3,000
· Be sued by the RIAA for illegal filesharing: 1-in-4,666
· Be wrongly declared dead by a Social Security data entry mistake:
1-in-23,483
· Die from a food-borne illness this year: 1-in-33,333

The Odds of dying in a ...
· Flood: 1-in-30,000
· Tornado: 1-in-60,000
· Lightning strike: 1-in-83,930
· Earthquake: 1-in-131,890
· Asteroid impact: 1-in-200,000*
· Tsunami: 1-in-500,000

The Odds of Injury Requiring Medical Treatment From:
· Lyme's disease: 1-in-18,100
· Snake bite: 1-in-25,300
· West Nile: 1-in-68,500
· Shark attack: 1-in-6,000,000

The Odds of Being a Victim of ...
· Assault by Firearm*: 1-in-325
· Poisoning*: 1-in-1,400
· Murder this year: 1-in-16,917
· Strangulation*: 1-in-34,424

The Odds of Drowning in ...
· Natural water: 1-in-2,828
· Swimming pool: 1-in-6,031
· Bath tub: 1-in-9,377

The Odds of Dying From ...
· Heart disease: 1-in-438
· Cancer this year: 1-in-600
· Staph infection: 1-in-16,146
· Measles: 1-in-300,000,000

The Odds ...
· Your child will be involved in a school bus accident this year: 1-in-29,180
· Your baby will be delivered by
c-section this year: 1-in-3
· You cannot find Iraq on a map, if you are between age 18 to 24: 2-in-3
· You will have a car crash within the first year of driving (if you are 16 years old): 1-in-5

The Odds of Believing ...
· That it's better to be poor and thin, than rich and fat: 2-in-3*
· You are "extremely stressed": 1-in-3
· That the best way to get rich is to win the lottery: 1-in-5
· Your tattoo was a mistake**: 1-in-7
· You saw a UFO: 1-in-7

The Odds of Winning Jackpot in ...
· Slot machines: 1-in-16,777,216
· Calif. SuperLotto: 1-in-41,416,353
· Powerball: 1-in-146,107,962
· Mega Millions: 1-in-175,711,536

The Odds of ...
· Dating a millionaire: 215-to-1
· Writing NYTimes bestseller: 220-to-1
· Finding four-leaf clover on 1st try: 10,000-to-1
· Getting Rich on 'Antiques Roadshow': 60,000-to-1
· Dating a supermodel: 88,000-to-1

urgent report

I am beginning to think I should rename my blog Chicken Leg. Buy your chicken before the price skyrockets.  Evidently my dogs are eating many more chickens than I realized.

ANALYST SEES CHICKEN PRICES MOVING HIGHER
The year 2009 will enter the annals as the year of protein pricing, if Credit Suisse is proved right. The firm said that it expected to see chicken prices increase by more than 25% next year over current levels, with breast-meat pricing getting up to $2 a pound, versus current prices of about $1.40. That should help some of the bigger poultry processors, such as Pilgrim’s Pride (PPC). Pilgrim shares already made a pretty impressive move off the lows installed earlier this month, gaining nearly 40% the last three weeks alone. But before the company gets to scarf down those gaudy price increases, it’s going to suffer some steeper-than-expected losses in 2008, as it works to offset the rise in grain prices.

why I have neglected you

BECAUSE I GOT HIGH   (AKA Mary on Lots 'O Vicoden)

 

I was gonna write in my blog, until I got high
I was gonna walk the dog, But then I got high
I'm still on the couch, And I know why,

Because I got high
Because I got high
Because I got high

I was gonna feed my kids, before I got high
Was gonna clean the toilet lids, but I got high
The house is a wreck, and I know why, 
Because I got high
Because I got high,  Because I got high

Was going to physical therapy, but then I got high
Was gonna work out my knee, but I got high
Now I'm takin' dope and I know why, 

Because I got high
Because I got high  Because I got high!

 

Because I got high!

aoljpollCreated, aoljpollCreated_1

not much

Well, the operation was 3 days ago.  I have emerged from my comatose state created by the fog of drugs, and I want all of you to know that the excrutiating pain I felt for the past 3 days is slowly subsiding.  Now it is only slightly excrutiating.  In the end, I am sure it will be worth the pain though.  Too bad I won't have my narcotic painkillers after a few more days.  Those really are sleepy pills for me.   

I would like to mention that nobody told me how bad the pain would be afterwards.  It may be good in a way, but I was NOT prepared for it!!! 

Sorry, this is not the most exciting posting, but hey, life can be boring sometimes!  Think I'll pop another codeine!!!

the big op

So tomorrow is my big knee operation.  I have been stressing about it, mostly because they had trouble waking me up in November from surgery.  I have decided that this one will not be so bad as it is my knee they are operating on rather than tunneling through my abdomen via my belly button.  GROSS. 

Today is my last day to get things done, then I cannot do anything but keep  my knee lifted and iced for a week, and I cannot even SHOWER!  GROSS again!  My record for no shower is a 5 day camping trip, so this will be much worse.  Most people who know me know I like to shower every day with hot water or I freak out.  I'll probably be too drugged to realize how disgusting I am though, so there's a fun part to it. 

The fun part for you will be the journal entries I make while I am on those drugs.  I do not expect them to make much sense, but I'm sure they will reveal a part of my mind that is usually kept under wraps.  You should be frightened, unless, of course, you are Gary.  It will be a gleeful opportunity to have some fun with words.  But I am thinking that Sue has outlawed Gary from my blog, she seems to think Gary is upsetting.  He really isn't, he's a great guy with a quick wit, and a very sick mind.  This is why I admire him!  I am sure he is bored stiff with the whole mousecapades I have been talking about, but he's a guy, guy's don't get the female-hating-bugs-and-rodents thing.  They just mock it. 

I am not allowed to shave before my operation.  They don't want any cuts.  So, I will have hairy legs for them and no cuts, unless I spaz out as usual and get a cut somehow. 

Time to shower!  Only one more after this for a whole week!  AAAAHHHHHHHH!!!

a mouse note

I did mention that nice encounter with a mouse in the closet the other day.  There was no way even the most psychic person would know what was to happen next.  While I was vacuuming up all the dog dirt and hair, I noticed a small lump in the carpet I put down in front of the sliding door with a rope poking out from the edge.  I moved the vacuum, and bent over, lifted the carpet with my hand reached out to pick up the lump of cloth or whatever it was, and IT WAS A DEAD MOUSE!  It was flattened, but it did not pop the way that one I accidentally stepped on did.  Thank God!  But still, I freaked out, screamed like a banshee, and headed for the hills.  John was home, so he got to pick it up and dispose of it.

I used to like the fact that my next door neighbor has chickens, ducks and geese, even a rooster. They are cute and all the squawking does not bother me.  But John thinks the wild mice have discovered the chicken feed on the ground and have increased in numbers due to the bountiful food around.  Angel used to grab one, maybe two mice in a spring/summer season and bring it in to play, but this is completely out of control.  I have no idea of what to do, except sneak my dogs into the neighbor's yard and let them have a huge Thanksgiving feast a few months early. 

I am afraid to walk anywhere in my house now, you never know where a mouse, dead or alive, might be.  It is SO gross!

I am listening to Boys Don't Cry right now. What an awesome song, bringing me back to the days of college which were so happy and fun. The first time I really had friends. The Cure. A great band, and the beginning of mine. Who would have guessed.